Subculture

My poor week off, I never actually had time to fulfill my dream and have a pretty walk among snow in a winter with my love. Oh well. Also on 6th February it is gonna be 4 years me and my love are in a relationship at last, after all this what happened in a past. And I wanted my sister probably to take a picture of as at last. But when it's so cold, it is gonna be difficult. It makes me sad....

Last night my old friend came and we tattooed his leg. It's always a pleasure to talk to him about history and music especially. That was awesome. And my machine was working flawlessly.

It's a subculture sign

Dumb questions I am willing to answer

1. Who was the last person you held hands with? My Bf of course 2. Are you outgoing or shy? More like outgoing now. But I used to be shy. 3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? My sister's wedding :D I know you are talking about the person 4. Are you easy to get along with? Kind of.... 5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? Yes. sure. All the people take care of me when I get drunk. 6. What kind of people are you attracted to? Smart, sophisticated, beautiful, inspiring. 7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? Never a good question. I never know about the future. 8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? No one at the moment. Because I think about other things now :D 9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? It does not. But I find it unnecessary to talk about this thing. 10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? My Girlfriend and my Boyfriend 11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? My Girlfriend thought that I got mad somehow and it's the explenation that I did not indeed and I was busy, therefore I did not answer the phone. 12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? OMG. Recently I did not have time to listen to the music at all, because of my exams. I guess Creo - in the shadows. Black Ceiling - set me free. Senking - V8. 13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? Yes, very much. It tickles and makes me feel very loved. 14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? I Believe that all miracles are created by your mind. And luck only relates to your thoughts. 15. What good thing happened this summer? I did my secret dream come true. I also tattooed all summer :D And of course graduated from University. 16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? Yes. 1000 times yes. 17. Do you think there is life on other planets? Why it shouldn't be? 18. Do you still talk to your first crush? Yes. 19. Do you like bubble baths? Yes. 20. Do you like your neighbors? No :D 21. What are you bad habits? I am narcissist. I am very hot temper. 22. Where would you like to travel? Everywhere around the world. But the best destination would be Brasil for a moment, or USA, maybe Bali. 23. Do you have trust issues? I do not trust people like at all maybe, but it's not an issue. It's like a habbit. And I love it, because I do not ask anything from them, because I don't trust them. But I never say that to a person. Which makes whem to think that I do have trust in them. And nobody gets hurt. 24. Favorite part of your daily routine? When I wake up (since my lectures start at 5 p.m.), I tend to eat and watch some kind of TV show on my pc and I like this part of the day a lot. I feel so relaxed. 25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? My back I guess. 26. What do you do when you wake up? I brush my teeth. 27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? I like the tone of my skin a lot. I would never trade it to anything different. 28. Who are you most comfortable around? Mostly everyone. But around my boyfriend I get too comfortable sometimes. 29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? Yes :D 30. Do you ever want to get married? Not on my priority list. 31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail? Yes. During winter I tend to wear my hair like this a lot. 32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? Angelina Jolie and Angelina Jolie 33. Spell your name with your chin. Fuck you 34. Do you play sports? What sports? Not anything I am aware of at the moment, which is very sad. But I am hoping to start something soon. 35. Would you rather live without TV or music? Without Tv, because I am already living without it. haha 36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? Yes. 37. What do you say during awkward silences? Nothing. Or something silly mostly. 38. Describe your dream girl/guy? My boyfriend. 39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? Zara. H and M. I haven't been shopping for a while now, so I don't know... 40. What video games you like playing? I am not a video game fan. But I like sims3 I guess a little bit and GTA 4. Looking forward to play GTA 5 for several minutes :D in a future. 41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? Why not? 42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? That I am in another world right now. 43. Do you smile at strangers? Sometimes. But I am quite shy 44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? Space. I am very scared of coldness 45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? I don't know. I just love to start new fresh day. I never thing (almost) of the things I am gonna do that day, but I do love just new mood and happy feeling when I wake up. During night I forget everything bad what happened to me. 46. What are you paranoid about? About war sometimes. About my hair (I used to be). 47. Have you ever been high? Nope. 48. Have you ever been drunk? Lots of times, my son :D 49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? Yes. 50. What are you wearing now? My black soft hoodie with biker sign on it. Black pants with gold zippers and lots of socks haha 51. Ever wished you were someone else? Not very much actually. I just wished I was a better version of myself. 52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? That I could exercise more. 53. Favourite makeup brand? I am so bad at make-up. I don't have that sort of money to be in love with one brand 54. Favourite store? I don't have 55. Favourite blog? Maybe "Through a looking of glass". This girl is my dream girl. It's a pity though she posts quite rarely so.... 56. Favourite colour? Blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack 57. Favourite food?  Vegetarian Spagetti with marinated tomatos, cheese and lots of spices. 58. Last thing you ate? Ice cream. I don't know why. It's a minus outside haha 59. First thing you ate this morning? Eggs 60. Ever won a competition? For what? Yes, I did. Lithuanian language 61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? never 62. Been arrested? For what? never 63. Ever been in love?  yes 64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? Too personal 65. Are you hungry right now? I wasn't. But when you asked... :D 66. Do you like your online friends more than your real friends? Nope 67. Facebook or Twitter? None of this shit. I got tired of both of them 68. Twitter or Tumblr? Same here 69. Are you watching tv right now? no. Are you running out of questions? :D 70. Names of your bestfriends?  Ieva, Juste, my Boyfriend, Inesa, Jolita :D 71. Craving something? What? Some sleep, warmth. better life. 72. What colour are your towels? Red 72. How many pillows do you sleep with? 1 73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? 0 74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? I don't want to know 75. Favourite animal? I love most of animals. dogs, cats. horses. 76. What colour is your underwear? I forgot 77. Chocolate or Vanilla? Chocolate 78. Favourite ice cream flavour? Chocolate. Bubble gum. 79. What colour shirt are you wearing? Black 80. What colour pants? Black 81. Favourite tv show? "Friends" of cours. "Charmed" first few seassons. "Modern family". "Parenthood". "New girl" was, but now not so much. 82. Favourite movie? White Oleander 87. First person you talked to today? My boyfriend 88. Last person you talked to today? My Mom 89. Name a person you hate? One Journalist from Lithuania. you don't know him 90. Name a person you love? OMG 91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? OMG 2 92. In a fight with someone? Just a few times 93. How many sweatpants do you have? 2 95. Last movie you watched? Don't recall. Maybe "Practical Magic" 96. Favourite actress? Angie 97. Favourite actor? I don't have one 98. Do you tan a lot? no 99. Have any pets? No 100. How are you feeling? Melancholic 101. Do you type fast? yes 102. Do you regret anything from your past? Nope 103. Can you spell well? YES 104. Do you miss anyone from your past? NO 105. Ever been to a bonfire party? No 106. Ever broken someone’s heart? YES 107. Have you ever been on a horse? YES 108. What should you be doing? Doing my mother's in law homework 109. Is something irritating you right now? Everything. Especially these questions 110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? Yes 112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? I don't cry in front of other people 113. What was your childhood nickname? Swallow 114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? yes 115. Do you play the Wii? WHat the hell??? 116. Are you listening to music right now? yes 117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? I don't eat chicken 118. Do you like Chinese food? yes 119. Favourite book? "White Oleander" 120. Are you afraid of the dark? Not too much 121. Are you mean? sometimes. especially in the crowds 122. Is cheating ever okay? Nope. Not where I live 123. Can you keep white shoes clean? nope 124. Do you believe in love at first sight? Omg. I hate this one 125. Do you believe in true love? Yes and no 126. Are you currently bored? I am never bored 127. What makes you happy? Art 128. Would you change your name? Nope 129. What your zodiac sign? Leo 130. Do you like subway? Yes 131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? I just ignore  These questions were so boring hence I deleted some of them. Also some of them kept repeating too.

Dead inside

I feel not too well recently. Today I did one of the last tattoos I have planned and it makes me so sad. This is winter, or people don't want any more tattoos from me. I must say I kind of adopted the pace of being a half time tattoo artist and to meeting new people from time to time. But if it's over, I will be happy too, because I have to find a true path of my career and if it is not being a tattoo artist, so it's about time to find it out. Also I am happy I met so many people, I can't even count. That was an amazing experience anyway.
One more thing to be sad about is that I missed Salvador Dali exposition I believe so. My friend invited me today, but shortly after that she canceled, because she didn't have no one to leave her child with and also it was too cold. Since I am off tomorrow I guess I won't see it. I have to take what is the best from this time in my life. When I am free and I don't have any more tattoos. Well.... Shit happens :D And it feels so depressing durng winters. I feel dead.

Today I tattooed my one of the best friend's one of the best friend. so we had a lot to chat about :D

Summer plans

I hate winter, it feels so empty inside and out. Although I sometimes love snuggling with a cup of tea under the blanket with my love or alone. He has few free weeks from work now and we are planning on doing some business related to our future. But some of them may won't be revealed.
And we have big news in a family. I did not want to tell until everything was confirmed. It is that my little sister is getting married. It is gonna be at the end of the summer and I am so looking forward to this, because I am gonna be a bridesmade and the first one too. I am so excited that I will be able to care for my baby sister and to help her. There will be some traditions like bachelor parties and stuff like that. But this summer will be one more wedding in USA, where I am invited. I would be looking forward to this if I knew we are going. You never know with this economy and being a student with no formal job. But if this happen when this summer would be the best summer I ever had. But the only thing I know is that you cannot plan these things.
Also I spent this weekend so great surrounded by my whole family and few friends. We celebrated my sister's wedding annoucment. Just an informal being together with great food and some wine. That was an awesome weekend.

All I can hear is wedding belles recently. My older sister is willing to get married next winter too. But she is not too sure about these things yet. And still, life is going on here :D

Sorry about my English, I do not practice it too much lately. I've been way too busy...

Coooooold!!!!!!!!!

It's too cold to live, it's too cold to think and to write too. Therefore I am enjoying my free time as much as I can. My friend slept at my place one night and we had some girly cute stuff together. But I have to worn you, when you are 23 years old, it's almost no fun at all. You just want to sleep in your own bed and have your make up off. You need to worry that one more person will see you after you wash your face and with pajamas haha and in the morning. Especially if it is a start of a friendship. We are also planning on visiting Salvador Dali exposition. If so, I will be very happy indeed. But I have to say it's so cold and I don't feel like going anywhere. I look ugly to myself these few past days and it sucks.

Recent tattoos. Well, during winter it is not the best business - tattoos :D

Relaxing

I realised I want to take a break from everything. Therefore I played sims 3. Enjoyed good time with my friend and boyfriend. Also with my family. Today I even made a girly day for myself. That was so relaxing. Now I am off to paint ;)

And as you can guess I passed the exam. Amazing news and quite great indeed :))

Fish

I am hoping you haven't forgot me. I didn't, but I was hell busy with exams and now tattoos. Today I barely ate like always, when I am tattooing. And I got my new energy supplier and it worked great today. However we will see because I have to change one wire. But it's boring. I am waiting for the last exam results, because it was way too difficult. I never had one before. However it's a pity, because I am scared I won't pass it and also I was studying so much :(

Today I did this cover-up.  You have no idea how much I did want to do a fish tattoo and my dream came true. But it's sad I had to do it so dark because of the old tattoo and we started waves, but he wanted to leave it for next time :)

Still at home

I'll leave a quick note here. I have been studying my ass off and I am so happy that if I will pass this exam tomorrow everyhing is gonna be over at last. The whole month I have been waiting for this day. And also my long waited energy supplier arived and I will be able at last to tattoo more properly. And my sister came yesterday, she and her boyfriend gave us their old bed and we at last are not sleeping on the mattress anymore. Even though I am not quite sure about the place, it feels perfect, but it's next to a heater and I can already feel my skin getting dry. Ok, what else. I am trying not to get out, for the sake of my studies. I am also over watching/abusing Tv show "Charmed". I remember watching it when I was a child.

And I've been dreaming of living in this house so much. My friend said she wanted to visit San Francisco to see this house, but today I read that it is in LA haha

Drained

I am sitting here surrounded by pencils, trying to relax a little bit and to get to play Sims3 today, but it won't be possible, so maybe after the dinner I will be trying to study again. Jesus, I am so tired of this shit. It feels like you are all alone in the field. No one will ever help you. yesterday I had one of the last exams. It is draining, I never knew how much energy such kind of studying takes. Back in time when I was studying art, we drew more and had so many awesome lectures like Philosophy, you don't even need to study that. Just read for your pleasure. Well now everything is different. Also again during winter time I feel so old. I have just a small amount of tattoos and everything seems impossible for me.

Sketching something. Not sure what

Svaras

When I woke up I was in a good mood, a perfect mood for studying. But instantly everything fell apart. However, I got happy again while checking my morning e-mails and Fb, Twitter for an instance. haha. One Lithuanian Rapper called Svaras who I like very much and once I saw him alive, started following me on Twitter. Yeah, I started using one recently just for fun. But there is no fun at all. But he has like thousand of follofers and only follows few hundread and I am one of them. It made my day <3 even if just for a little bit. aw. Yes, I may sound like a total creep or jackass, but I am just sharing. As long as this morning I have no one to share this with....

Cat sitting

The few past days I had such a blast. My home turned into the cosyest place on earth. My girlfriend came with her daughter to play with a cat. I cat sit until now, but soon it will be over. I just cannot feel any sadder about this. I really would love to have one of my own to play with and she is also quiet smart at her age. So we spent the cosyest evening of all evenings, just backing a pie and having lots of tea, playing with a cat and drawing with little girl.
Now I am off to continue studying.

I was studying and she fell asleep on my shoulder. The prettiest creature on earth

Like a family

It seems that most of the people are in some kind of letarg. I am one of them. My eyes feel like full of sand or stuff like it. I am just running around and hoping it won't affect my results. The exam went quite well and the result was good, not too good, but good. But I thought I won't pass this one, so :D
Anyway, my friend spent like few past days at my place with her daughter. Little girl played with computer whole day long and we spent time chating, trying to study and shit. I also have been tatooing yesterday a big one. Therefore my friend makes me tea and we coock together. My boyfriend is veeeery good with kids and he spends his time playing with my friend's daughter. We lived these few past days like a real family. It amazed me. And my sister is probably bringing a cat to my place. I will be cat sitting if everything will go as planned. Therefore my friend is coming with her daughter and we will try to study. I just feel something I never felt before so much. It feels tight. But you'll never know. And I hope I'll get to see and play with the cat during the studying breaks.

Catering

I hope you like my stories. Just the stories. Last few days I was studying as much as I could. Even though at some point it became unbearable, because I wanted to play Grand theaft auto 4 with boys, who seemed enjoying it too much. I am not a fan of video games, but when it comes to studying anyhthing seems awesome. At least more awesome than studying. Also yesterday I was so ready to study, I sat down, I turned on my computer and kept reading. But my sister wrote me and asked if she could come with her cat and a boyfriend. I said yes. Then my friend wrote and asked me the same question. I again said yes. I thought it's just for few hours. But it turned into a whole day almost. Also she brought her child during the evening, therefore little girl played video games with Paul and we tried to study with my friend. I cannot say I did not study, but not too much. Though today I have 5 hours left and I am gonna use it wise. Wish me luck with all my exams.

I remember that day, when it was so cosy. I am watching 'Charmed' again.

Black dress with white collar

Last night I felt terrible as I am feeling now. I have to remember a bunch of useless information and my needels wouldn't come. I would open a paypal dispute, but it's too late. Oh well I thought. But everything seems to be bad these days. Therefore I consoled myself by ordering one of the last dresses from "The cultlabel". I just hope it will fit me well. Also I wanted one for ages. However I was thinking of one with long sleeves. But ended up ordering this one, almost by force. My boyfriend insisted me buying it. haha. Well I guess it's worth to try.

Bad day

This day was rather awful. It started strange at first, also studying felt unbearable, but I knew I have to do this. So I kept going, even though my head still feels like an empty pot. But the worst thing happened while I was tattooing. First I did not want to tattoo today so much. I knew I have to study, but the guy insisted. And during the procedure he got an attack. I got scared to death omg. His friend helped me and my boyfriend too. I thought he was dieing and my heart almost stopped. But apparently he has some kind of illness related to these attacks and this is not his first time. Can you believe in this? I was shocked. So we could not finish the tattoo, even though we only started it. Therefore I got this unbearable feeling all day long. Then we took the dog out for a walk and she rolled herself over into a real shit. This day is just getting worst. I am off to study more. even though I can't remembr a thing.

Tattooing mostly

I've been tattooing a lot lately, but not studying much. I wish I could, I wish I could. Tmorrow I am off to Klaipeda, so maybe there I will study. I have only few days left. I have to concentrate and only see my goals for these few weeks. Which are to finish this term with good grades (or even to finish it), also to be a good tattoo artist. I just have to concentrate more on my studies. Wish me luck on that.

This one took me 3 and a half hours. I did half of it while stading up. Believe me - this is no fun haha

Good luck to me

I must admit, I became boring. But just for few weeks in a future, when I will have my most important exams. I have to say I am quite scared. I have been tattooing and lazy studying a little bit. I just feel so involved with the tattoos, even though I cannot see any progress this month. I feel like I cought up with so many troubes and daly routine, that I cannot feel as much joy as I would love to. Yesterday, for an instance, I was meditating for a little bit, but at some point I could not stay calm just because I was awfully scared of the upcoming exam. It's really huge and very difficult one. Wish me luck on that.

By the way, the internet connection in my home town is terribly poor. Maybe it's good, because I should study anyway.

If everything goes well by the plan, I will have a bunch of tattoos. But at the same time I have a bunch of stensils to make, also to finish the strategic plan before the Monday. Good luck to me.

2013 review

At a bus station I started to think what happened during 2013. I don't think it was a special year and I am also not a fan of sentimental stuff. Also I don't think that much of the ineteresting things happened. But anyway, I will make a list of things. You can skip it if you want. 

1. First of all I continued tattooing. I did make a little progress in my opinion. Also I got two new very good quallity tattoo machines. 

2. I am still with the same guy, even though we love each other more than ever (I hope for more years in a future).

3. I graduated from University this year and got a fine art bachelor degree.

4. I took off my braces.yeaaay.

5. My love got his nose straightened because of the health issues. However he looks now better than ever.

6. I dyed my hair black. First time in 5 years.

7. I got calmed inside of myself. 

8. I found some new good firends. I even got myself a best friend this year.

9. I saw Dalai Lama alive. I stood next to him and felt so happy at a time.

10. I got to do my secret dream. I am so happy I did it.

11. I started masters degree this year.

12. I participated in one awesome photoshoot.

13. I participated in so much parties, but few were just extraordinary. 

14. I bought a new laptop. This is a big deal to me, because all of the money I earned by myself and I am not into buying new things related to technology. and I bought it instead of a trip i was saving for.

Of course so much more happened, but I cannot share this secret information with you guys ;)

Annoying

So basically our neighbour gone wild. Second time in my life I hate a human being so much. He listens to a pop music very load at 2 p.m in a morning and wouldn't let us sleep. Nothing even actually helps. We called the police annonimiously, he got very mad at a time. Stayed silent for 15 minutes and then turned his music on again. Also with amazingly ugly words dedicated to God knows who. Maybe his friends, maybe neighbours, because he didn't really know that was us :D because he was shouting to other wall. And this morning again same thing. I mean wow, does this human being have a job, how does he live if he hasn't and drinking all day long, it doesn't seem like he has a business either. Also not sleeping at all maybe? Wtf? A fucking monster.
Ugh. Watever. Just he is too dumb to realise that people want to sleep.
Yesterday I amde a little break from all the things. My boyfriend installed "Grant theaft auto 4" into my new pc and he played it all evening himself :D well I let him to do that, because I was watching documentary movies (about Anne Frank for an instance) and drawing. I miss this thing so much.

I copied Caravaggio, because I find his style a little bit similar to mine. Therefore I realised I don't have to become who I am not, I have to do what I am best at. I do like the contrasts and that's my thing. so This is it.

P.S. Do you have any tips like what to do with an annoying neighbour? haha

2014

This New Years celebration was rather extraordinary, not in a good way though. I got very tired of my studies and I wanted to rest so much. I also was way too cold to go anywhere and while we were sitting at the bus station, I could not think of anything good coming out of going to visit my parents and Paul's parents on a New years eve, because it's all the same everytime we go there. So we gave our tickets back, went to get some pizza, but all the places got closed before we got there. Therefore we bought pizza in a super market, which was more expensive and rather not tasty at all. We drank wine and watched Louise CK, also George Carlin. Watched some Fireworks, talked and went to sleep. We had some people inviting us to do some stuff, but I could not move my body. I never felt so bad during New years eve in my life. Today I am not feeling too well either, but I hope I'll be better after eating some spagetti and doing my homework.
Anyway, I hope 2014 will be great for all of us. However today is only a normal simple day, like any other day and you don't have to hope for anything good happening out of nothing. Everything you do or not do, change your life, not a new number, a new date. Also, it is suppose to be my year. I was born during the horse year haha. Yes, I am gonna turn 24 years in the summer. I am already feeling old.