Sad

Recently I started to not having any more plans for the future, I started to just want to survive. Yes, you heard me correctly, I have such a small amount of clients that somedays I think I am loosing my "little business". There is almost no way to find a job while studying, because you must choose (I mean, there are no good jobs available and job + studies = disaster in Lithuania, because you have so much stuff to do, oh an + few tattoos a month now). It all feels like the previous autumn almost, the only good thing is that my boyfriend has a job, if he would not, we would probably die from a hunger and other stuff. But, I am happy for the opportunities I've got in my life, that I made my dream come true and that I have a possibility to get a masters degree. And now working non stop, I wish this working and studying thing would give me something valuable in the future, but... You'll never know. Also, I don'w want to loose it all what I have created yet, I love tattooing, I wish it was my job. And having all the normal jobs with horrible hours and such a small salary scares me so much: difficult studies + full time job = hair loose, bad achievements in job and in studies, almost no sleep, bad health and horrible life.
This weekend is my mother's in law birthday, I hope we will spend some awesome time together, because I love this family. Also, again, gifts, so expensive. Damn it. And maybe a cake after all this stress. I am worf it. I haven't got a minute to rest this week.
Next time I'll post something. Today I did all the work that has been postponed and so on. So, not much to show...